Mr. B was a 6'4" tank. He was tall, bald, incredibly muscular, and quite intimidating to anyone that stepped into the same room as him. When he began working at our elementary school, most students were scared of him due to his sheer massiveness! On my brothers first day of therapy with Mr. B, my mother and I were both present and sat in on the session. I was just 10 years old, but from the second I saw him interact with my little brother, I immediately gained so much respect for him. He was one of the most kind, genuine, and caring individuals to ever come in contact with my brother and cared so deeply for him and his impediment. Needless to say, my parents kept my little brother in speech therapy with Mr. B until he was in the sixth grade. In those six years my little brother spent with him, he made a transformation that I can't even put into words. He was giving talks in sacrament meeting, speaking voluntarily to people he didn't know, catching himself when he would start to stutter and correcting himself, and so much more. He was a new kid. Upon his graduation from Mr. B's program, Mr. B shed tears of joy for my brother and told my parents what a blessing it was to have worked with him.
Years later, we ran into Mr. B at the supermarket and it was a joyous reunion. He caught up with my mother, asked my younger brother about his progress and how he was enjoying high school, and so on. My mother noticed a wedding ring on his finger and congratulated him as she noted that he was not married during my brother's therapy sessions. He graciously accepted the congratulations and upon my mother asking to see a family photo, he showed us a photo of him, his partner, and their two dogs. It was not shown in the slightest, but I knew that my mother was surprised, as she has always been a very traditional, conservative person. She congratulated him again and we said our goodbye's. As we were leaving the supermarket, I simply asked my mom, "Did you know?" and still surprised she said, "I had no idea."
I share this experience not because finding out Mr. B was gay changed the way we looked at him (because that was not the case in the slightest), but because of the wonderful relationship we had with him and because of the amazing, caring person that he was. My mother recalls vague conversations during my brother's therapy years in which he would say that he was, "still waiting on the one." Even as a young kid, I remember thinking to myself, "I wish Mr. B could find someone to marry because he would be the best dad." After finding out about his partner, should my wish for him have changed? In my mind, no.
The church has taught members of the importance of a temple marriage between a man and a woman as well as the importance of rearing children in love and righteousness. We know of the blessings that carrying out these important covenants and acts will bring to us, but we also know of the grievous sin that it is to carry out these acts inappropriately or in a way that is not appeasing to the Lord. It pains me to see so many couples, man and woman, that have terrible relationships, have bore children that they can't/don't care to care for, and much more. On the other hand, there are incredible couples that raise great children, have a healthy, happy relationship, and follow all of the steps that God has laid out for us. This same spectrum goes for gay couples.
I am fully aware and have a testimony of the direct statement in The Family: A Proclamation to the World that states:
"The family is ordained of God. Marriage between a man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a mother and father who honor marital vows with complete fidelity."
Though I look at people like Mr. B and say to myself, "he would be a wonderful father and love his children unconditionally", it doesn't change the fact that it is not what God would have us do. God has given us guidelines to follow to ultimately return back to Him and it is our choice if we wish to follow those or not. For me, personally, that is a lifestyle that I never wish to be a part of. I have found a husband whom I love and we look forward to having a family together. What we can do, however, is simply love those around us regardless of the way that they choose to live their life and be sure that they know that we care about them. After all, the second great commandment given to us by the Lord Himself was to Love One Another.
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